It astonishes me how many couples meet their significant other over online dating sites these days. Statistics show that one in every three couples choose this method. And that’s not just America but virtually all over the world! The old ways of meeting men or women at school, work, or the local coffeehouse are diminishing, and the reign of online dating has become greater than ever before.
Online dating can be overwhelming sometimes. There are so many sites to choose from, and some are geared toward specific types of online dating. There is chemistry.com and eHarmony for committed relationships; Matchmaker, Zoosk, and match.com for casual daters; and ChristianMingle.com and JDate.com for Christian or Jewish singles respectively. The variety of sites available is endless; even if you’re over 50 or a single parent, there is a site for you!
Though with each one basing their search on different trends, the “right person” could be different for each site…
With each one, however, you must always set up a profile. This is the information that’s all about you that you want your potential suitors to know.
Though each site is unique, the following are general tips that you can use on any site to boost your profile.
The first fact you should decide is what you want. If you want to be a casual dater, let it be known; some of you may prefer to date with more seriousness; let that be in your profile. Often online daters will say on their profiles, “I’m open to anything playful or serious – whatever comes along.” Although that may be good and true for some, it can possibly come off as too steady for casual daters, not committed enough for serious folk, and/or too indecisive for all.
If you really are looking for something in between casual and serious dating, be more descriptive about what you want. Instead of what was stated above, try saying, “I am looking for an adventure. Casual could be fine as long as the relationship is not taken too lightly, and a serious commitment is good as long as we are not tying ourselves down immediately. Most of all, I want to enjoy where I am and who I am with.” That’s a clearer statement showing more of what you are looking for in a relationship.
Next, if you have “must haves,” share them now or forever hold your peace. If you’re a dog-lover, it’s always easier to find another dog-lover instead of changing someone into a dog-lover. If you have any other similar requirements, they should be stated on this profile. This causes less time to be wasted during the actual dating and forgoes the disappointment of meeting someone you like who doesn’t have key things you want.
Also, find those characteristics that make you unique because, yes, each of you is unique. If there is something that you believe requires a certain type of person, write it down! (I.e. if you are someone who wears only hemp clothing, stating that may help you find someone who doesn’t mind that kind of thing.) You may be thinking, that’s bad because it will turn some suitors away, but this can only be a good thing because it turns down people you’d be potentially less interested in because they don’t have the same likes.
Next, a polished profile is a good profile. Avoid the common mistakes people make when filling out their online dating profile:
- Awkward wording
- Grammatical errors
- Misspelled words
These common errors come off as not caring about your profile or the online dating world. Spending a reasonable amount of time on your profile is a very good idea. Putting in thoughtful ideas, filling out the entire profile, and giving specifics about yourself only helps your case in showing you are worth the time and effort. Stay true to who you are and don’t create a virtual profile that is completely different from who you really are. Later those lies can be hard to live up to. Don’t sell yourself short, though! Write about your best moments, your humor, your passions, and the precise things you enjoy! These things should give a good idea about who you are, what you enjoy doing, and what you are ideally looking for in your significant other.
Finally, the last tip is about your profile picture. You want to look great, but you don’t want to look like you’ve spent hours in front of the mirror prepping for the perfect shot. It’s proven that girls hate these types of photos and you should not post them at all costs:
- Pictures in the mirror
- Pictures with no shirt on
- Pictures with you in front of your car/motorcycle
- Pictures of you with your ex boyfriend/girlfriend
For your main profile photo try:
- A clear picture of you smiling and looking approachable
- Pictures that make you look natural and real
The wrong photos can make you look sleazy, boring, too desperate, or not worth the time. That’s why it’s important to build a library of photos before you publish your profile. Get your friends to take pictures of you when you go out – and if you are too embarrassed to say it’s for an online dating site, tell them it’s for a family album. Make sure you portray the ‘real you’ in the photos. If you are a ‘stay at home’ type of person, but all your photos are of you at the club – people online won’t buy it. That doesn’t mean all your photos need to be boring, just having a good mix is the best way to go.
So now that you have learned all this, go and refresh your dating profile. But most importantly, be patient! You may want someone quickly, but girls often get tons of messages everyday (especially the pretty ones) so you need to have a great profile in order to stand out among all the other people on the dating site. Having the right combination of photos and a cleaver profile will lead to more dates.